Green Tortoise Bus Tour (Week 2)

Despite having to leave Ray behind in Zion National Park, we started week 2 in optimistic mood, with plenty of good hiking and sights on the agenda. Our new driver was a different prospect altogether to our beloved Lukas, but we ended up with a great group of people and had a great week. A meat dinner (badly needed) and a strong dose of karaoke kicked the week off with aplomb. Not hiking the Grand Canyon on a hangover was a great decision.

At the Grand Canyon, we learned that 98% of the 5 million visitors per year stay on "The Rim" and never descend its depths. As impressive as The Rim is, we were excited by the challenge of being amongst the lucky few who hike into the canyon and see it from below. With 10 miles ahead of us, and well over 100 degrees farenheit promised by midday, we hit the road early. 7 of us tamed the Canyon like its never been tamed before. "Team All The Way" made light work of the descent, and then enjoyed a spot of swimming in the Colarado at the base as a reward. Sleeping under the stars and cooking a hot dinner for 7 people with the trusty matchbox stove only added to the experience.

The following morning, a 4am start was necessary to hike out of the canyon before the sun starts to win the battle. We hiked the 5 miles to halfway in the complete darkness, and had well-deserved hot showers at the top! An amazing hike and memories to last.

As the week progressed we also visited Arches National Park in Utah; the historic Route 66; Monument Valley which is the iconic image from so many western movies; Lake Powell which provided some cleansing after a few days of abstinance and was also the location for more team posing! To round off a great week, we looped back to Vegas where we teamed up with Ray again. A great trip with some great taming!

Green Tortoise Bus Tour (Week 1)

"So...." heading from SanFran at silly o'clock on a Monday morning, we began what was to become a major highlight of our trip thus far. Having met Lukas, our driver, I knew we were in for a good fortnight. The man exuded a knowledgeable confidence, kindness and aura which were immediately appealing. He seemed to know everything about the natural surroundings we found ourselves in, and he had a healthy fondness for overly-revealing male postcards. I'm not sure which of the 3 of us fancied him most!

The bus is something of a fantasy. Its big and green and hauls everything you could need for 2 weeks on the road with 35 people. Communal cooking created meals you couldn't even imagine. You can sleep under the stars, in a tent, on the bunks, or in "the womb" - the 6m x 3m bed at the back of the bus. No vehicle could be better equipped for a road trip.

A couple of slow days brought us through Santa Cruz, Monterey and Los Angeles. Hollywood was distinctly underwhelming and we were glad to be hitting the National Parks the following morning. Joshua Tree was the first stop and what a stunning intro. Surrounded by desert and rocks, we were let loose to climb and explore the area. The rocks had a weird type of grippy texture which allowed you to walk along crazy angles and climb up and down seemingly impossible spaces. "Team Tame" was born. Look around, spot a challenge, tame it! I can't recommend Joshua Tree enough. Great climbing and truly unique surroundings.

From such beautiful natural surroundings, Las Vegas was a contrast to say the least. As the Green Tortoise is a vegetarian bus, we all devoured some steak before revelling in (2) limo tours, some gambling and some good old fashioned sessioning. Vegas was on the itinerary again later in the trip, so we were really only scratching the surface this time. Next stop Zion National Park for more hiking.

Lukas had recommended the Angel's Landing hike for a good workout, with great rewards at the end. He wasn't wrong and after the steep and narrow couple of miles, we were atop a fabulous plateau overlooking the whole valley. The photos really don't even do it justice.

Another camping night, another National Park the next day. Bryce National Park has an informal reputation for being smaller, but more spectacular that the Grand Canyon. After the 8-mile Fairyland hike, I would agree. The crazy vertical stacks and arches create a fabulous canyon full of colour and shape that is difficult to believe. The end of the day here at Bryce marked the end of our first week on the bus. Depsite our best efforts to squeeze our buddy Ray onto the new bus for week 2, we had no joy. We promised to meet up in Vegas in a week and head south to Mexico together. A lot of other goodbye's (Rita, Wifey, Nicole, Dilbert, Phelpsie, Mike, Marc, Claire et al) wrapped up a great week on the Tortoise.

Green Tortoise slideshow

USA Road Trip

Having spent 8 hours trying to do a handful of simple tasks in Bellingham, without a car, and weary after the tournament, we realised it was time to solicit the services of Bruce (our trusty gold Hyundai). What Bruce lacked in personality, he gave in efficiency. What he really needed was a partner in crime... That's where Shiela came in. You see, Bruce is from Mars. Shiela is from Venus. He refuses to ask for directions when lost, so Shiela (our newly acquired SatNav) pre-empted Bruce's every move. To say they never fell out would be a white lie, but on the whole, it was a very effective arrangement. Together Bruce and Shiela brought us to places we could never have found without them. For this, we owe them a debt of gratitude.

So, our 3 week, west coast USA adventure began, in Bellingham, WA, near Seattle. Highway 101 took us down the Washington and Oregon coasts, with the stunning scenery making up for the slow miles. Through Washington and Oregon, we camped almost every night, and hiked almost every day. Al's matchbox camping stove provided breakfasts and dinners fit for kings. Rising with the sun, our body clocks seemed to quickly adjust to using all our energy during the hours of daylight. We seemed to be flat-out by 8 or 9pm every night but still managed some "dance while you think Charades" by the campfire!


Califonia was a welcome change of scene, with much more on the agenda than hikes and camping. We started in Arcata (north Cal), which is known for its weed-growing, liberal, politically-opinionated inhabitants. Arcata didn't disappoint. It has as many crazies as Gastown, Vancouver, but here everyone is loaded from sales of the herb. We ended up playing pool with a couple of the college students and got a great insight into the mind of some of the American voters out there. "Ron Paul, man"; "You guys are controlled by the Queen, man"; "No way man, if I get a passport, then the Feds will know all about me". Solid.

Further south in California, Al detoured via Sandy Aygo, while myself and Fi headed for the hot springs and wine country. We were told that these particular springs were "typical north-California". Little did we know that this meant everyone was going to be in the nip! 2 days of "discovering ourselves, man" and both of us were fairly sure that the commune life wasnt for us. A spectacular place, but too many auld lads sitting cross-legged for my liking!

Sonoma County was a fabulous next stop where we went wine-tasting and toured the Bezinger family estate. Myself and Bruce were operating a strict Designated Dessie policy, so Fiona did the bulk of the vino tasting - "I could get used to this"! Another mere couple of hundred miles and we were crossing the Golden Gate bridge. Fiona's first time, and my first re-visit in 20 years. The next part of the adventure was going to bring us on the 2-week "Green Tortoise" bus, so we were forced to say goodbye to Bruce. 2000 miles on the clock - a faithful servant and friend.

Slideshow of USA Road Trip